CHICOPEE, Mass. (Mass Appeal) – Expectant dads don’t get nearly enough attention paid to their needs. In honor of Fathers Day this year, we’ve got some advice from dads who have “been there, done that.” Michal Klau-Steven is “The Birth Lady” and she joined us with 5 tips.
5 Things Expectant Dads Should Know
by Michal Klau-Stevens, The Birth Lady
Expectant dads don’t get nearly enough attention paid to their needs, I’ve learned as a pregnancy coach at TheBirthLady.INFO. The fact that you are about to become a father and you have your own questions and concerns often gets lost in the mommy-and-baby centered world of maternity. In honor of Fathers Day this year, I thought I’d pass along some advice from dads who have “been there, done that.”
I asked the experienced fathers in my social media community, “What are 5 things expectant dads should know?” Here’s what they had to share:
- “Expect your partner to experience pregnancy brain!” ~ Rich
- “[Dads] come [to childbirth education classes] because they are expected to, and that is a good start. The exceptional dads-to-be become passionate, enthusiastic, and committed. They read and learn as much as they can to advocate and support their partner in labor, birth, and all things postpartum. When we see these guys make that transition, inevitably, the birth experience, nursing, and recovery story is always more positive. There is a direct connection to birth satisfaction and avoiding or helping limit PPD (postpartum depression) in the weeks after birth. Additionally, there is an obvious, deeper connection between these guys and their partners that is wonderful and awesome to see develop throughout class and through their labor/birth and as they become new parents.” ~ Keith (who teaches childbirth education classes with his wife)
- “If you and your wife plan to breastfeed, 100% support is nearly a requirement for early success…Getting up at night for the baby because the wife is exhausted from a marathon breastfeeding session, just SAY NO to formula (this one is especially tough while momma is away), and all in all be there for moral support throughout.” ~ Paul
- “The most sage advice I was given while my wife was pregnant was a friend with 2 children telling us, “Your lives are over!” I didn’t know quite what he meant at the time, but now I know that he was warning us that our lives (as we knew them) would be turned upside down, and in every conceivable way. Most of my complaints have had to do with sex and intimacy. From a guy’s perspective, it has meant while I used to enjoy being my wife’s #1, I have had to accept my role as #2 since even before the baby was born. … Spontaneity is pretty much gone out the window and interruptions happen more times than I care to admit. Also, if you thought of breasts as “sexual” in the past, you will soon see them in a new light as they fulfill their true purpose of feeding the baby. Now you have to share! …I guess you could say that sexiness and libido have gotten replaced with motherliness. That can be good and bad depending on what your childless life was like. Just prepare for a lot of frustration, working A LOT harder and giving up your social life, but also know that the person you brought into the world will give you a new kind of amazing joy you could have never imagined. Someday things may return to normal, but perhaps they won’t.” ~ Nate
- “It used to be cool to make like guys didn’t have a place in this process. That has changed. We are stronger, tougher, and sexier being there for our partners every step of the way.” ~ Keith
I could not have said it better myself.