Would-be burglar caught towing safe

He was charged with DWI, breaking and entering, and larceny

SWANSBORO, NC. (CNN) – This alleged burglar may not know how to crack a safe, but he apparently knows how to tow one.

Dwayne Taylor, Deputy Chief of the Swansboro Police Department told CNN, “When I pulled up on the scene, I was like, you’ve gotta be kidding me.”

We think of safecrackers as being suave, like James Bond listening for the right combination.

But instead of a satisfied sigh, 22-year old Ryan Mullins must have been grunting after police say he broke into this Swansboro, North Carolina pharmacy thru the drive thru window and tried to put the safe in his trunk.

Witnesses like Shawna McCarthy watched him struggle. McCarthy said, “When he could not do it, he started to tie it to his bumper.”

He drove a couple of miles, and came up behind a police car. The officer noticed in his rearview mirror that an object was being dragged. The officer let Mullins pass, then caught up and arrested him. He was charged with DWI, breaking and entering, and larceny, among other things.

Police say he was after the controlled substances kept in the pharmacy safe.

But at least the pharmacy safe didn’t wreak havoc like the gigantic one that pummeled pursuers in the movie “Fast and Furious 5.”

Mullins has already had the honor of being inducted into a website called clumsy crooks.

He joins the ranks of dumb suspects like the guy police say ate his bank robbery note; the purse snatcher who ran for the mall exit, and had to run through the mall exit; the burglar who broke in on one side of the glass door but tried to leave through the other; the thief who grabbed a diamond ring, but found the store door locked so he swallowed the diamond – police just waited for his digestive system to produce the evidence.

As for the would-be safe cracker?

As said in the British spy series “The Saint”, “The funny thing about people is, they always put their safe behind a Renoir.”

Behind a Renoir? How about behind a 1999 Lincoln town car?

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